For the Dread.

No Alpha feedback, so this is the same as the Alpha...

Shadow Hunter
Even the most intelligent of races can have fears of what might be lurking within the shadows, and a special breed of dread known as shadow hunters have learned how to use their connection to fears to manipulate darkness to aid them. Whether it is concealing them from sight or turning shadows into substance, shadow hunters are at home where others fear the unknown.

Covert Nature: The shadow hunter is at home in dark places and knows how to avoid detection. The shadow hunter gains an insight bonus to Stealth checks equal to half her class level (minimum +1). This ability replaces fearsome insight.

Shadow Diversion (Su): As a standard action, the shadow hunter can cause shadows to take physical shape adjacent to a creature within 30 ft. Unless the creature makes a successul Will save (DC 10 + 1/2 the shadow hunter’s level + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier), the creature treats the shadow as an enemy when determing if the creature is flanked. If the shadow is adjacent to multiple creatures, the shadow hunter must choose which one is affected by it. This ability replaces Devastating Touch.

Grasping Shade (Su): A shadow hunter of 5th level can make shadows turn into reaching, grabbing tentacles of substance. As a standard action, the shadow hunter can target a creature within 30 ft. and direct shadows near the creature to entangle the target. The creature targetted cannot be in an area of bright light or the attempt fails. The creature may make a Reflex save to negate the attack with a DC equal to 10 + 1/2 the shadow’ hunter’s class level + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. Entangled creatures can attempt to break free as a move action, making a Strength or Escape Artist check. The DC for this check is equal to 11 + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. This ability can be used a number of times per day equal to 3 + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. This ability replaces the bonus feat normally gained at 5th level.

Step Through Shadows (Su): At 10th level, if the shadow hunter is in an area of dim light or darkness, she can travel to another location of dim light or darkness, as long as the destination is within 60 ft. of the shadow hunter’s initial location. Using this ability counts as a daily use of the terrors ability. This ability replaces the terror normally gained at 10th level.

Hadn't even noticed the alpha for this. I almost feel like there should be more done with Shadow Diversion, but I'm not sure what. Maybe start allowing it to grant additional penalties to the creature it's flanking (replacing a terror or two in the process). Possibly a minor image type thing that the dread uses to allow it to distract their enemies, allowing them to Stealth past. I think a way to use it to grasp the enemies, slowing them down (small penalty to movement, attack, and AC) could be neat.

I definitely like the feel to this archetype, though.

Perhaps additional uses of Grasping shade would force the target to gain the grappled, then pinned condition? With appropriate rolls, of course.

Something like this?

Successive successful uses on the same target before the target has successfully broken free cause the target to gain the grappled condition if entangled and the pinned condition if grappled.

I suggest allowing Improved Feint to reduce the time to use Shadow Diversion to a Move Action, and Greater Feint to reduce the time to a Swift Action.

Half of me wants to suggest making it a Bluff check (same as Feint), but the other half argues that it's more of an illusion (Will Save to see through a Shadow effect) and should include text that this is a Mind-affecting Pattern effect.

Is there any duration to Shadow Diversion? I'd assume "for 1 round" by default, which is lame, because at least a basic Feint grants you its bonus for one attack. If that's the case, then Shadow Diversion should probably be reduced to a Move Action to start with. Alternately, perhaps increase the duration to "until the end of your next turn."

Step Through Shadows should probably copy some verbiage from Shadowdancer's Shadow Jump ability.

Jeremy.Smith wrote:

Something like this? Successive successful uses on the same target before the target has successfully broken free cause the target to gain the grappled condition if entangled and the pinned condition if grappled.

I thought I had already responded to this. Apparently not. Anyways, I definitely like that idea. Would failure on successive uses cause the whole effect to fail (dropping flanking, and whatever effect you had already achieved with it)? I'd be inclined to say no, and just have it not gain the next step of the effect.

Good question - and I agree with you on it should not negate the whole effect.

Syonique wrote:

I suggest allowing Improved Feint to reduce the time to use Shadow Diversion to a Move Action, and Greater Feint to reduce the time to a Swift Action. Half of me wants to suggest making it a Bluff check (same as Feint), but the other half argues that it's more of an illusion (Will Save to see through a Shadow effect) and should include text that this is a Mind-affecting Pattern effect. Is there any duration to Shadow Diversion? I'd assume "for 1 round" by default, which is lame, because at least a basic Feint grants you its bonus for one attack. If that's the case, then Shadow Diversion should probably be reduced to a Move Action to start with. Alternately, perhaps increase the duration to "until the end of your next turn." Step Through Shadows should probably copy some verbiage from Shadowdancer's Shadow Jump ability.

Lots of good points in here that I need to evaluate.

Revised, including some of the feedback from Syonique - I didn't change Shadow Diversion's main mechanic - still a Will save, not mind-affecting, because it's manipulation of light, not a mentally-implanted image. Mirror image isn't mind-affecting, either.

Shadow Hunter
Even the most intelligent of races can have fears of what might be lurking within the shadows, and a special breed of dread known as shadow hunters have learned how to use their connection to fears to manipulate darkness to aid them. Whether it is concealing them from sight or turning shadows into substance, shadow hunters are at home where others fear the unknown.

Covert Nature: The shadow hunter is at home in dark places and knows how to avoid detection. The shadow hunter gains an insight bonus to Stealth checks equal to half her class level (minimum +1). This ability replaces fearsome insight.

Shadow Diversion (Su): As a standard action, the shadow hunter can cause shadows to take physical shape adjacent to a creature within 30 ft. Unless the creature makes a successul Will save (DC 10 + 1/2 the shadow hunter’s level + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier), the creature treats the shadow as an enemy when determing if the creature is flanked until the end of the shadow hunter’s next turn. If the shadow is adjacent to multiple creatures, the shadow hunter must choose which one is affected by it. If the shadow hunter has Improved Feint, it reduces the action needed to use this ability to a move action, while Greater Feint reduces action needed to a swift action. This ability replaces Devastating Touch.

Grasping Shade (Su): A shadow hunter of 5th level can make shadows turn into reaching, grabbing tentacles of substance. As a standard action, the shadow hunter can target a creature within 30 ft. and direct shadows near the creature to entangle the target. The creature targetted cannot be in an area of bright light or the attempt fails. The creature may make a Reflex save to negate the attack with a DC equal to 10 + 1/2 the shadow hunter’s class level + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. Entangled creatures can attempt to break free as a move action, making a Strength or Escape Artist check. The DC for this check is equal to 11 + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. Successive successful uses on the same target before the target has successfully broken free cause the target to gain the grappled condition if entangled and the pinned condition if grappled, although a successful save only stops the target from gaining the additional condition. This ability can be used a number of times per day equal to 3 + the shadow hunter’s Charisma modifier. This ability replaces the bonus feat normally gained at 5th level.

Step Through Shadows (Su): At 10th level, if the shadow hunter is in an area of dim light or darkness, she can travel to another location of dim light or darkness as if by means of fold space, as long as the destination is within 60 ft. of the her initial location. Using this ability counts as a daily use of the terrors ability. This ability replaces the terror normally gained at 10th level.

Covert Nature makes me think of my custome ninja class... interesting... and this gave me a few idea's for my ninja class... as is though, i can't even try this archetype. Oh well, if there's time to do so when i finally can, i'll definently try it.